In a scene that could only make sense in the post-truth circus of modern GOP politics, House Republicans are bending over backwards—then twisting sideways and upside down—to defend Donald Trump after a grotesque birthday letter from him to convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein surfaced earlier this month.
Instead of doing what any sane person might do—condemn the content and move on—Republican lawmakers launched a full-scale damage control campaign to claim the letter, and more specifically Trump’s very recognizable signature, is fake.
“From what I’ve seen, it’s not his signature,” claimed Rep. Byron Donalds of Florida. Yes, that Byron Donalds—the guy who’s seen enough Trump documents to know exactly what the man’s Sharpie scrawl looks like. The same signature that appears on everything from Trump’s books to hats to official White House proclamations is suddenly unrecognizable when it’s sitting on top of a disgusting birthday note to Epstein.
Donalds isn’t alone in this sudden outbreak of selective blindness. Rep. Tim Burchett of Tennessee immediately pivoted to whataboutism, dragging in Biden’s use of an autopen.
“I don’t know. I mean, anyone can do a signature. We’ve seen autopens been used quite a bit by the Biden administration,” Burchett said, as if a mechanical pen used on formal documents has anything to do with Trump allegedly sending birthday wishes to a convicted pedophile.
Then there’s Rep. James Comer—the same guy who’s turned every napkin Biden ever touched into a federal case—suddenly deciding this letter isn’t worth a second look.
“The president says he did not sign it. So I take the president [at] his word,” Comer told CNN. The man spent two years digging for Biden family skeletons but won’t even glance at the Trump-Epstein letter.
“You asked if I’m going to be trying to figure out whether that, you know, fake or not, probably not. We’re going to be trying to get justice for the victim,” he added, without a hint of irony.
Rep. Jim Jordan of Ohio—who has his own long shadow when it comes to ignoring abuse—joined the denial parade too. “I don’t buy” that the signature was Trump’s, he said, adding that he doesn’t think the House should investigate Trump’s ties to Epstein.
Of course he doesn’t. This is the same guy who allegedly turned a blind eye to sexual abuse claims while he was a wrestling coach at Ohio State. If there’s one thing Jordan’s good at, it’s looking the other way.
Some Republicans didn’t just deny the signature — they brushed the whole thing off like it was nothing. Rep. Eric Burlison of Missouri said, “I highly doubt that it’s his signature, but if it’s true and he did sign that letter, I don’t think there’s anything there.”
So… even if Trump wrote a personal note to a known pedophile, it’s fine? Nothing to see?
Burlison then tried to pull the classic “I haven’t seen it” excuse — until CNN’s Manu Raju offered to show him the letter right there on the spot. Burlison laughed and refused, saying, “I don’t want to see it.”
This isn’t satire. This actually happened.
Even House Speaker Mike Johnson played dumb. “I’ve heard about it. But no,” Johnson told reporters when asked if he’d seen the letter. “And the White House says it’s not true.”
Not true? The Epstein estate handed over the letter. Trump’s signature is right there. This isn’t some deepfake from 4chan—it’s a physical note retrieved during the legal wind-down of Epstein’s assets. But somehow Republicans want us to believe someone forged Trump’s exact signature decades ago, planted the letter, and waited until 2025 to spring it… after Trump was reelected.
That’s not just dumb, it’s insulting.
Democrats aren’t holding back. Rep. Jim McGovern of Massachusetts put it plainly on X: “So let me get this straight … 20 years ago, Democrats forged Trump’s signature on a creepy birthday card to a pedophile … planted it in Epstein’s estate before Trump even ran … and then waited to release it until after Trump got reelected? Got it.”
Rep. Eric Swalwell of California was even blunter. “I have two eyes. You have two eyes,” he told CNN. “Anyone who looks at that letter which was provided by the Epstein estate knows whose signature that was.”
And that’s really the point. You don’t need a handwriting expert to tell you who signed that letter. You just need a working brain and a shred of honesty—two things in very short supply among House Republicans this week.
What’s worse than the pathetic attempts to spin this? The laughter. The shrugs. The smirking disinterest. They’re treating a vile connection to a serial abuser like it’s just another Tuesday on Capitol Hill.
Say what you will about political loyalty, but this isn’t spin—it’s full-blown self-humiliation in service of a man who wouldn’t lift a finger for them if the roles were reversed. It’s gross, it’s shameless, and it’s yet another reminder that for this GOP, there’s no line they won’t cross to protect Donald Trump—even if it means excusing a letter to Jeffrey Epstein.
Watch the clips below via Daily Koss:
