Pam Bondi’s latest move on the Jeffrey Epstein saga has set the internet ablaze.
The Department of Justice just sent Congress a six‑page letter outlining a “complete” list of names pulled from the controversial Epstein file release. Trouble is, that list includes a freakshow cast of long‑dead celebrities like Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, and Janis Joplin. Yes, the King of Rock ’n’ Roll before Epstein was old enough to walk, read, or do much of anything got tossed in there alongside modern political figures.
Critics from all sides are calling this what it looks like: a transparency stunt gone so wrong it reads like a bad infomercial.
The DOJ claims it listed “all government officials and politically exposed persons” mentioned at least once in the files — regardless of context. That means someone who was merely name‑dropped in a press article or peripheral file gets the same billing as someone who might have actually corresponded with Epstein or his circle.
As noted by The Daily Beast, the optics are horrific.
“This alphabetical list strategy is the oldest trick in the book to protect the powerful. When you mix names of people mentioned in passing with those who were active participants, the shock value dilutes the actual evidence,” one X user slammed in the aftermath of the letter’s release.
Democratic Rep. Ro Khanna didn’t mince words either, blasting Bondi’s list as a deliberate fog machine. “The DOJ is once again purposefully muddying the waters on who was a predator and who was mentioned in an email,” he wrote, pointing out the sheer absurdity of putting Janis Joplin — who died long before Epstein was even a legal adult — in the same breath as actual convicted predators.
Meanwhile, Republicans aren’t exactly lining up in praise either. Across social platforms, commenters mocked the whole thing:
“Imagine putting Elvis on the same page as a criminal and expecting people to trust anything,” wrote one X user.
“Bondi needs to be arrested for obstruction,” wrote another.
This isn’t just random ridicule — it’s crystal‑clear evidence that the Department’s attempt at *transparency* has blown up in its own face. The letter isn’t seen as clarity, it’s seized on as strategic confusion.
That’s because this list — meant to be the public’s window into the Epstein files — reads more like a bloated celebrity game of “who died first” than serious documentation of criminal behavior.
Bondi and the DOJ say they’ve complied with the Epstein Files Transparency Act. They insist no names were shielded “for embarrassment, reputational harm, or political sensitivity.”
But including the ghosts of Hollywood just dilutes the credibility of every real — and damning — mention in these files. So instead of shedding light, the DOJ’s latest drop feels like a swamp of distraction.
